Yesterday I had a brilliant idea to take a road trip to see a football game. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to stay overnight or just do a day trip. That's really the only thing I was pondering. I'd already made up my mind to pay for the ticket. I'd made up my mind that I was going alone. And, I'd made up my mind that I needed to get away from Atlanta.
Fast forward to this morning and I'm no longer taking this trip. Why? Because a friend called me and told me she needed to come to Atlanta because she needed to talk to me. I have no idea what she needs to talk about. I assume it's something serious because she wants to do it face to face. Without hesitation I scrapped my plan to go out of town. Why? Because I have this habit of putting other people's needs before my own. Somehow, I've made her need more important than my own. And hey, maybe it is, but maybe it isn't. In the last post I talked about managing my mental health better and this trip was about my mental health. It hasn't even been a week and I've already given up on me. *rolls eyes* I actually might still take this trip. It's really bothering me that I canceled it. I'm sure whatever she needs to talk about will still be an issue when I get back. Maybe she can come next weekend, or maybe we can Skype about it. I don't know. I've always dreaded the idea of not being there when someone really, really needs me. I'm just not sure if this is that kind of situation. I guess the question I should ask is "how does whatever she needs to talk about affect me?" It probably doesn't, which means it's her crisis.
What's a gal to do?
Showing posts with label Mental Health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mental Health. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Is Your Mental Health Important to You?
How serious do you take your mental health? Take a second and think about it? I don't think we take our mental health seriously enough. I am right in the middle of the absolute breakdown of one of my friends and it's awful. Did I see it coming? Somewhat, but it's harder to deal with than I expected.
We all have a breaking point. That point doesn't have to end with hospitalization and a straight jacket, but there's a moment when everything just explodes. Most of the time, you can cry by yourself and a few hours later you're good again. But, sometimes crying just isn't enough. I don't ever want to get to the point where a good long cry by myself won't make my internal stress meter restart. For the first time in a long time, I'm really worried. I normally manage my stress pretty well. My friends laugh at me because I take random "mental health" days off of work. I know when I need a break. I also know that if I don't take that break, the office manager might find herself looking at my hand print in the mirror the next morning. That won't be good for anyone.
I feel like we've all forgotten how to take a moment and just be. Vacations cost a lot of money, so most of us are lucky to get one every couple of years. We've gotta find some other ways to get away from the things that cause us stress. Or we at least need to learn to manage our stress better. Tonight my mother told me I need to learn to not care so much. I told her that I just can't not care because that's not who I am. She told me I'd better figure out how to make it happen. She's right. I'm stressed, not because of anything concerning me, but because of the things concerning the people around me. I'm not saying I don't have any problems, because lord knows I do. But luckily the people in my life are so fucked up that I don't have time to focus on them.
Seriously, my focus is all out of whack. I have a million things I'm working on and I can't dedicate the appropriate amount of time to any of them because I'm constantly having to be there for (insert random person's crisis) It's getting to be too much. I either need to change the people around me, or change the people around me. It's going to be hard, but I've gotta do something. I'll start with a good, long cry by myself, and see if that helps.
We all have a breaking point. That point doesn't have to end with hospitalization and a straight jacket, but there's a moment when everything just explodes. Most of the time, you can cry by yourself and a few hours later you're good again. But, sometimes crying just isn't enough. I don't ever want to get to the point where a good long cry by myself won't make my internal stress meter restart. For the first time in a long time, I'm really worried. I normally manage my stress pretty well. My friends laugh at me because I take random "mental health" days off of work. I know when I need a break. I also know that if I don't take that break, the office manager might find herself looking at my hand print in the mirror the next morning. That won't be good for anyone.
I feel like we've all forgotten how to take a moment and just be. Vacations cost a lot of money, so most of us are lucky to get one every couple of years. We've gotta find some other ways to get away from the things that cause us stress. Or we at least need to learn to manage our stress better. Tonight my mother told me I need to learn to not care so much. I told her that I just can't not care because that's not who I am. She told me I'd better figure out how to make it happen. She's right. I'm stressed, not because of anything concerning me, but because of the things concerning the people around me. I'm not saying I don't have any problems, because lord knows I do. But luckily the people in my life are so fucked up that I don't have time to focus on them.
Seriously, my focus is all out of whack. I have a million things I'm working on and I can't dedicate the appropriate amount of time to any of them because I'm constantly having to be there for (insert random person's crisis) It's getting to be too much. I either need to change the people around me, or change the people around me. It's going to be hard, but I've gotta do something. I'll start with a good, long cry by myself, and see if that helps.
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